Stop: 2010 New Year Resolution

It is The Second of January in the year 2010. Wow gee, is it 2010 already? Why do people say that? Wow, is it really 2010 already? If we weren't ready for it after the 365 days of 2009 we weren't paying attention. Maybe it means that time as we measure it by weeks, months, and years is unnatural and irrelevant to how we run our lives.

I suppose I should make a resolution to make a resolution like I used to do every new years, every start of the school year, and sometimes on my birthday. Take a moment to change something; either stop an old bad habit or start a new more useful practice. Sometimes people will ask, "What's your New Years resolution?" Often they won't let it go until you say something even if its absurd. You may try to get out of it "Sorry, I can't. I never stick to those thinkgs anyway." But they''l insist, "Come on, you have to have at elast one. In fact, I think generally people are waiting for you to say To quit this or to be more that, so they can scoff and say. "Yeah, right." Especially if its a close friend or relative. Especially if they have toruble keepign their own promises, vows, resolutions, etc. Or they will be the ones who say three weeks later when you are reaching for that third pizza slice or lighting up again, "what happened?"

The idea of resolution should not be to completely change something over night but to make a goal to work towards and don't take it too hard when you mess up. The first resolution one should make is to not hate yourself if you break a vow or a resolution. The word Re-solution implies a solution, an idea to fix somehing, and to RE-apply the solution as much as it takes until the resolution becomes a sentence like: It's been 100 days since I smoked a cigarette or I have been treating people with more kindness and people seem easier to deal with even in hectic times.

So what is my resolution? My resolution is to stop. Just stop. When life gets too hectic, too crazy, or I find myself repeatedly doing self-destructive things or causing pain to myself or others I have to learn to say: stop. Stop. Close your eyes. Breathe. Your mind may try to start up again but just say: Stop. But if- Stop. But phone is rin-Stop. (If it's important, answer the phone and by all means don't stop driving and cause a pile-up.) But if you are at a rest, you sit down in the break room at work, or at a stop light, or drive thru window or in church or in school or in your apartment, house, while lying in bed and your mind starts listing things you forgot to do or what you plan to do tomorrow or replaying stupid conversations or arguments over mundane bullshit or even intense important issues- Stop. Just stop.

But I can't- Stop! Stop saying I can't. Stop saying I will. Stop saying okay to things which are not okay. Stop using words that hurt others. Stop playing violent video games or listening to info-tainment garbage. Stop letting other people tell you how to think, what to think, how to treat people who disagree, how to manage every aspect of your life. Stop saying "yes", stop saying "no", stop saying "I guess so." I do that alot: I guesso, I don't know, um, uh, er. Stop. Stop lying stop smoking, stop eating more than you need, stop buying beyond your limit, stop living in survival, in denial, in revival, on trial, on fast food, on broken promises, on sugar-coated lies. Stop believing or saying you believe in things that you really don't believe in. Just stop.

If you can learn to stop, you can learn to start doing more to change your life. If you learn to stop bad habits, you can learn to cultivate new, beneficial ones. If you practice stop, you will be prepared for the day when everything stops.

It is 2010. I think I know why the numerical year feels wrong. Jimi Hendrix sings, "the hours getting late," another song by an artist which I cannot think of has line that goes "it's later than it seems." I think there is a growing fear that we are living in the end times either it was prophesied by some ancient tribes who have vanished from the land(or wiped out by disease, war, or whatever) or by climate crisis or a rogue asteroid or endless wars, superflu, pick your favorite apocolyptic scenerio. There is growing paranoia about 2012. Is it going to be the end of life as we know it? No. It won't. At least not for all of humankind. There may be cataclysmic events, earthquakes, hurricanes, etc. that will mean the end for some unfortunate folks. However, I believe that 2012 will be as good time as any to stop. Just stop. Allow all our progress, all our hopes, fears, and our collective insanity to just stop. Maybe there will be revelations as confusing and scary as those in the book Revelation. Maybe there will be mass extinctions of humans as well as animals. Maybe- Stop.

Just stop. 2012 is in the future. It doesn't exist. All we have is now. Stop worrying about the future, stop regretting the past or even revelling in past memories. Stop. This is all we have and will ever have. Here. Now. This moment. Stop.